Thursday, April 18, 2013

Still Among the Wicked

Thanks Mel!
I love spring, but I am having a long week. I am knee-deep in edits for 'Aphrodite's War' and stupid me, I also decided I should edit fifteen chapters of the erotica I'm piddling around with. I haven't touched 'Chasing Monsters' in a week. In fact the only new stuff I'm doing lately is this blog.

I am only floors away from finishing my spring cleaning, (Thanks Darci for cleaning my fridge! I love you!) just in time for my yard work to begin.

I am brewing wine for a wedding and looking for a new company to do my swag after my current supplier's printer went bust. (Sorry Sweetie. <3 I'm not going to name you, because I don't want to affect your business negatively.) After I started crying at lunch, a good friend volunteered to finish off the bookmarks I've been struggling with for weeks. (She had them done in two days.) God bless you, Melaida <3 I'd offer them out, but MY printer is out of ink.

I am neglecting friends and family. My poor cousin has been expecting me to phone her for three weeks. I keep e-mailing her to apologize for the lack of timing. She has two small boys. You'd think I could find SOME time to chat if SHE has the time, right? I'm awful.

In the midst of this chaos, I had some serious doubts. I never had these problems when a had a full time job. You know, like a normal person. And like I said, I'm not writing anything new.

So what the hell am I doing here?

Maybe I'm not cut out to be a writer. Maybe I don't have what it takes to commit to writing everyday to make my dream happen. Maybe I can't handle the pressure that comes with marketing, networking, organizing, handling everyday life, and most importantly, WRITING! Maybe I'm kidding myself and I'm not really all that talented...And then I got some news from my publisher, Heather Savage of Staccato Publishing.

Yours truly is a finalist  for the Midwestern Independent Book Awards! A finalist! Who, me?

I'm pretty sure I haven't quite grasped the humongousness of this honor, but it's a little hard to fathom. I beat out over one hundred books, and this is a big deal! Everybody wish me luck, because I really want to WIN.

But if I don't win...I think I've already figured out that I belong. Somebody noticed Thoeba and me. I'm a keeper in the literary world, and my work is valid. I deserve to feel good about my work, dammit!

I guess I'd better not disappoint everybody after all! I gotta  get cracking! :D

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